On Harvard Opinions.

I’m sure you have seen it by now.

The article floating around that essentially says homeschooling is “bad” for kids and should be banned.

With nearly every family in the country trying to continue their children’s education at home… I honestly can’t even begin to conceive what would make someone think now is the time to spread that message.

There’s been an underlying debate, about whether the “distance learning” model most schools have adopted can even be considered home schooling… it seems like the jury is still out on that.

But, the fact is a lot of families are suddenly trying to figure out how to:

• Manage their house while everyone is home.

• Telework or keep their businesses afloat while everyone is home.

• Manage their child’s school work and keep their behavior on track… while everyone is home.

It’s sink or swim. And a lot of people feel like they are either currently sinking, or they’re pretty damn close. Because (did I mention this yet?) everyone is home. And no one gets to take breaks from this to go on a “non essential” store run, or visit with friends, without feeling extreme guilt for possibly adding to the chaos.

As soon as I read the article, I was immediately transported back to 6 months ago. When I was residing in a hotel with my children while we waited on our lease to begin at our new home on base. Something that is pretty common for military families when they change duty stations.

The hotel was on base, so it was small. The room was the standard two bed, one desk, one dresser, mini fridge, and a microwave type of room. We still had about a week to go in the hotel when I started to see news stories and articles on social media about a study that found that 95% of baby food items contained at least one toxin.

We were living in a hotel.

• 

Eating fresh and healthy foods without being able to cook turned out to be more of a struggle than I had bargained for. To be honest, it wasn’t something I even thought about until we were on day three of eating dinner at a restaurant. At this time of our lives my husband was in training and couldn’t be with us. So eating at restaurants, alone, with all three children was a task.

I couldn’t do it anymore. So I went to the grocery store and tried to find whatever foods I could that could be microwaved. I need to simplify my life for my sanity. Pre cooked meats, sides, and canned foods were the obvious answer.

Purées and yogurt melts for the baby were a staple snack during not only this time, but the entire month before as we drove all around the country. So to see an article saying I was poisoning her when I was already feeling vulnerable, felt beyond unfair.

I couldn’t help but feel blamed. I couldn’t help but wonder why the people who can stop the toxins from ever making it into our food, don’t.

I felt judged.

I felt shamed.

I felt like I was failing my kids.

I knew, deep down that I was doing my best. I was working with what I had. I was in survival mode and it had to be enough until our situation evolved. I knew that when things were different, I would be able to make different choices.

Right now, that’s what we all have to do. As we start to see “experts” talk about how badly our kids need peers and public education… how we are going to end up somehow screwing this all up – we have to remember that if we are loving parents who our children can depend on, then we are doing enough.

Seeing that Harvard article made me remember all of the people I’ve met who were homeschooled who are great people, and it helped me realize whether my kids end up homeschooled forever, or just for a season, they will be okay.

We have to filter out the noise, and know in our heart of hearts that it is there purely to make us doubt ourselves.

There’s a whole system built on making us feel inadequate. There are entire industries that thrive on our fears and misguided perceptions about ourselves and our capabilities. These cultures know that they do better when we feel worse. So we have to be careful. Not just now but always!

While we are all asked to fall in line, then blasted for it, we have to remember that we are ALL just doing our best with what we have. And when things change, so will the way our “worst” and “best” looks.

We have to remember that now is not the time for guilt and shame or fear of failing.

It’s quite the opposite. Now is the time for unstoppable courage to look around and say “I can do this…” and believe it.